I'm exhausted now. The posts I've made recently are as disturbing to me as they are to you. I need to take a break from painful truth (and probably you do too).

Here I am at the Essex County Cross Country Championship race in my Senior year in high school. Our team (Columbia High School) placed first, and I broke our school record (12:30 for two-and-a-half miles).

The track coach at University of Pennsylvania sent me a telegram, "Good luck on your college boards." I did OK, but mainly he wanted me on his team. I was offered a full scholarship: tuition, room and board.

But I didn't take it. I'd been running since I was four years old and was tired out. Instead, I went to an elite Eastern University.

As Hitler said to August Kubicek, remembering the early days: "That is where it all began."

Richard Koenigsberg